112 posts tagged “family”

Two things happened this past week the left me kind of sad. First, my oldest son, who is seventeen, swam in his last swim meet. He made the regionals which were held in Tallahassee and we were holding out hope that he would make state, but even though his times were good, they just weren't good enough to move on.

My wife and I have known that it was going to be a sad day ever since the swim season first started. We've been going to his meets for the past three years and we have made some pretty good friends with the kids and their parents, not to mention the coaches as well. Donna took tons of pictures and we cut out every article that was in the paper, but when the last meet was finally over it left us feeling empty knowing that it was all done.

Now, he is playing soccer. Again, we are going into it with excitement, but with trepidation too, knowing that it is his senior year. I'm just not ready for another one of my kids to graduate high school.

The second thing that happened was more on a personal level for me. The regional swim meet was on Friday, so the team went to Tallalhassee on Thursday to spend the night. My wife got the day off and went with the team (I couldn't get the day off, but managed to leave work around 2:00 and get there for the finals). This left me and my youngest son, who is thirteen, at home by ourselves on Thursday night.

Every time in the past when my wife had to go somewhere overnight my son would be all excited because he could sleep with me. To be honest, I like it too. I know he is growing up and to have him ask to sleep with me somehow makes me feel like he is still little.

Anyway, when bedtime came around he didn't make mention of sleeping with me. It sounds selfish, but a part of me was crushed over that. In an instant I suddenly realized that my youngest child was no longer... well, a child. When I went to bed that night I went with a heavy heart.

My kids are growing up and I can't do a thing to stop it.     

With everything that has been going on lately, I am designating this as my song of the week (especially the first verse). Check it out on YouTube.

JUST ANOTHER DAY IN PARADISE by Phil Vassar 

The kids screaming, phone ringing
Dog barking at the mailman bringing
That stack of bills - overdue
Good morning baby, how are you?
Got a half hour, quick shower
Take a drink of milk but the milk's gone sour
My funny face makes you laugh
Twist the top on and I put it back
There goes the washing machine
Baby, don't kick it.
I promise I'll fix it
Long about a million other things

Well, it's ok. It's so nice
It's just another day in paradise
Well, there's no place that
I'd rather be
Well, it's two hearts
And one dream
I wouldn't trade it for anything
And I ask the lord every night
For just another day in paradise

Friday, you're late
Guess we'll never make our dinner date
At the restaurant you start to cry
Baby, we'll just improvise
Well, plan B looks like
Dominoes' pizza in the candle light
Then we'll tippy toe to our room
Make a little love that's overdue
But somebody had a bad dream
Mama and daddy
Can me and my teddy
Come in to sleep in between?

Yeah it's ok. It's so nice.
It's just another day in paradise.
Well, there's no place that
I'd rather be
Well, it's two hearts
And one dream
I wouldn't trade it for anything
And I ask the lord every night
For just another day in paradise

Well, it's ok. It's so nice.
It's just another day in paradise.
Well, there's no place that
I'd rather be
Two hearts
And one dream
I wouldn't trade it for anything
And I ask the lord every night
For just another day in paradise

For just another day in paradise
Well, it's the kids screaming. The phone ringing
Just another day
Well, it's Friday. You're late
Oh yeah, it's just another day in paradise

Over the years I have felt the hand of God on my life in many ways. Those who do not believe in God might consider some of those times as mere coincidences.

For example, there was the time I had a flat tire on a hot summer day with a van load of kids and a man with a hydraulic jack stopped to help me. Come to find out the only reason he stopped was he wanted to pass along a favor because he had a flat tire the night before and a man and woman had stopped to help him. What was the “coincidence”? It was my own brother and his wife who stopped to help him.

Another example was when our stove was broke and we didn’t have the money to replace it. The “coincidence”? Out of the blue we get a call from a family member who does manicures and pedicures telling us that one of her customers is redecorating her kitchen and is giving her stove away. Would we happen to know anyone who needs it? 

There have been things like that throughout my life and it would be easy to let them pass as coincidences, but I know that God is real and I know that he takes care of his children.

There was one thing God did; however, that no one will ever be able to convince me wasn’t an all out miracle.

My daughter was around thirteen and she was riding her horse, Eagle. I hated that horse and still do because he scares me to death. Let’s just say that I never really trusted him. Anyway, she was thrown off and we had to rush her to the hospital. Once there, since she hit her head, they ran a CAT scan. The doctor saw something on her CAT scan that he didn’t like.

We were referred to a hospital in Gainesville that specialized in this type of thing and the doctor confirmed that Amanda had a spot on her brain. It was actually resting above her brain and underneath the skull and was about the size of a golf ball (only flattened out). More tests proved that it wasn’t cancerous, but the fact that it was just sitting there was unnerving. We were given two options. Surgery, or leave it and keep an eye on it. If it didn’t grow then he wouldn’t mess with it, but if it started to change size then he would remove it. 

We went home heavy hearted. That night, while my wife and I were discussing what to do, Amanda came into the room crying. With tears streaming down her face she said, “I don’t want this thing on my brain Daddy.” It was heart breaking, but it made our decision easy. No doubt, as long as that spot was there she would worry about it. So, we made the call and a date for surgery was set up.

Friends visited and cards came for her. Everyone knew that she was going to have brain surgery and it was a nervous time for all of us. The Sunday before the surgery the pastor asked if he could pray for her in front of the church. Of course we said yes and she was led to the front where loving hands were placed on her and a petition was put forth to God for her healing.

The day before the surgery I had to work, so my wife and mother-in-law took Amanda to the hospital for some preliminary testing. They were to scan her again and get a good location and size of the spot for the surgery.

I’ll never forget the phone call I got that day. My wife was on the other end of the line so excited that I could hardly understand her. She kept saying, “It’s gone! It’s gone!” After finally getting her calmed down I learned that the CAT scan showed absolutely no signs of the spot on her brain. Even the doctor couldn’t believe it.

I have no doubts that God reached down and healed my daughter. We were so happy. Instead of taking the next day off of work for Amanda’s surgery, I took her to play putt putt golf instead. I think I had a grin on my face for a month.

We definitely saw a miracle that day and every time I think back on it I thank God for healing my daughter. Unfortunately, sometimes I get so wrapped up in this crazy life that I fail to recognize all of the small miracles that happen every single day. The fact that I still have a job, food to eat and a roof over my head should be cause enough to send my on my knees in thanksgiving.

Thank you Lord for helping me see that today.  

I took the family to Alexander Springs in the Ocala National Forest today. My youngest brother and his family, my mother and two of my older brother's sons came along as well. Florida has many springs like Alexander. The water stays 72 degrees year round and is extremely clear. We had a good time swimming and just lounging around in the shade under the oak trees.

It reminded me of when my wife and I were dating and went to another spring called Juniper Springs. For some reason a load of bikers decided to visit the spring that day and they were all over the place. We found an open piece of ground close to the bikers, set everything down on a blanket and made haste for the cold water.

After swimming a while we came back to find that our tin of chocolate chip cookies that had been made just for the occasion was missing. We immediately blamed the bikers. There wasn't a lot I could do about it. I was six foot tall and hardly weight 150 pounds and the bikers were... well, they were an assortment of leather clad, tattoed, overweight, long haired, furry faced men and women (no furry faces on the women though) and there were a lot of them. I might have been young, but I knew better than to start something with that bunch.

Later on, after bemoaing our lost cookies, we decided to take a walk on the nearby trails. On the way to the trails a movement caught my eye and I looked over toward the trees. To my amazement, our tin of cookies was rolling on the ground and there, running right behind it was the cookie thief. It was a brown, furry faced...  squirrel. We chased him off and took our cookies back. Thankfully, the squirrel never managed to get the tin open so we still got to enjoy them (they were a little crumbly though). I did feel pretty bad about blaming the bikers.

Preston Walters rolled his eyes and sighed heavily as warm air started coming from the air conditioning vents. This always happened when he was in the car line; it was one of the reasons that he hated picking Misty up from school. He shut the air off and pushed down on the electric window buttons. The front, passenger window glided down with ease, but the other three stayed put. He slammed down on the buttons with his fingertips repeatedly, hoping to get some kind of reaction, but the windows didn’t budge.  

 By the time he got to the pick-up point he was soaked with sweat and totally frustrated. Misty saw his car and started jumping up and down, waving excitedly. When the all clear signal was given she ran to the window and shrieked, “Hi Daddy!”

In a sour voice he uttered, “I’m hot. Just get in the car so we can get out of here.”

She opened the door and jumped in, throwing a pink book bag in the floorboard. Totally oblivious of his bad mood, she said, “I like it when you pick me up Daddy.”

Preston looked her way, forced a smile and lied. “So do I Honey. So do I.”

Misty talked non-stop all the way home, going into great detail about every minute of her day. Preston simply drove and half listened, offering an obligatory, “Really?” or, “You don’t say?” during the rare quiet moments. When they reached the house Misty jumped out as soon as the car stopped. Before he could even get out of the car she was bursting through the front door. As he watched her run inside he could hear her small, excited voice, “Mommy, Mommy! Guess what I did today?” Preston sighed and leaned over to pick up the book bag.

Later on that day, while walking to the garden, he relived his drive home with Misty. He didn’t like the way that he felt toward his six year old daughter, but he just couldn’t seem to get over it. Misty was their third child and the only one that wasn’t planned. In fact, she was a total surprise, coming nine years after Tiffany and eleven years after Jack, now a senior in high school. He thought about having one child ready to graduate while another was just starting out. He suddenly felt tired… and very old.

He stopped at the gate and looked out onto the garden. This was his favorite place to be, his silent escape from life. He spent at least thirty minutes a day here pulling weeds, picking off bugs, looking for new growth and just enjoying the time outside. It always helped him get his mind straight. His eyes moved to the end of the garden. There, completely covering the fence was the plant that had become the central point of his backyard getaway.

He had found it about a month before, one little leaf poking out of the ground at the end of the bean row. He had started to pull it up, but it looked like a squash plant, so he left it where it was. He checked it almost daily and the little plant seemed to take on a life of its own. Before long it had put out large green leaves and Preston decided that it was a pumpkin. Then, it started branching out with long, wispy tendrils that reached out and took hold of the fence. One day he looked in on it and a beautiful white flower had opened up. There, attached to the flower, was a small green fruit shaped like an hourglass. He knew then what it was; it was a gourd.

Disappointed, he thought about pulling it up. It was, after all, in the bean row. Besides, you can’t even eat gourds. But he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He enjoyed watching it too much. So, he left it where it was and every day since then he had rushed out to the garden to check on it. He spent a lot of time manipulating the vines so they would grow up the fence and it had practically covered every square inch of it. He was amazed how something that started out so small could grow so quickly. 

Preston was still admiring the gourd plant when he felt something brush against his leg. He looked down and saw Misty. Her small hands were holding onto the chain link gate and her face was pressed up against it so that one eye was staring through a rusty link. She only said five words, “I like your garden Daddy,” and then she looked up at him and smiled. Then, as quickly as she was there, she was gone.

Preston watched her skip away and a disturbing thought crossed his mind. Misty was, in fact, just like his precious gourd plant. The gourd plant came up unexpectedly; so did Misty. The gourd plant showed up in the wrong row; Misty showed up in the wrong part of his life. He was disappointed when he found out what the gourd plant really was; he was disappointed when he found out his wife was pregnant with Misty.

His heart melted as he thought about Misty. Was he treating this gourd plant better than he was treating his own daughter? How much time had he actually spent with her, talking to her, really listening to what she had to say? Was it possible that he was holding a grudge against her for coming along so late in his life? Was he actually blaming her for some of his marital and financial problems? The more he meditated on it the more he shamefully realized that it was all true.

 He thought a moment and then looked back toward the flowing plant at the end of the garden. He had been so wrong about that plant. In a matter of weeks, with a little care and nurturing, it had become the centerpiece of his garden. What if he would have pulled it up when it was just coming out of the ground? He would have never gotten to watch it grow or see it bloom. He would have missed out on so much.  What was he missing out on with Misty by acting the way he was?

A sound shook him out of his thoughts and he turned to see Misty running across the yard with her arms held straight out to the side of her body. She turned and waved, “Come play with me Daddy.”

Preston looked at his garden, then back at Misty. He could almost hear the gourd plant silently pleading with him to step inside the gate. There was a moment of indecision. Then, somewhere in the back of his mind a distant voice spoke to him, Go play with her.

He spoke out loud, in answer to the voice, “But what about the garden?”

The voice answered back, Are you raising a garden or are you raising a daughter?

The question shocked him and he was still thinking about it when Misty called out to him again, “Come on Daddy, play with me. Please?” She stopped right in front of him, arms still extended, making bubbly airplane noises. Then, she stepped forward, wrapped her arms around his legs and said, “I love it when we play together Daddy.”

Suddenly the garden didn’t look so enticing and he found himself leaning over to hug her back. With a slight tremor in his voice he said, “So do I Honey. So do I.” And this time, he really meant it. 

I was talking to my wife the other day and she mentioned that her tummy was upset. I said to her, "You know, most men would never use the word tummy."

"What?"

"The word tummy. Most men would never use it in a sentence."

"Why not?"

"I don't know... it just seems like... like a feminine word."

Sarcastically, she asked me, "Well, what would a "real" man say instead?

I responded with, "Stomach. A "real" man would say stomach. It's possible that he would use the word belly, but that even has a slightly feminine edge to it."

This started a conversation on other words that I would never use and I think I can speak for a lot of other men as well. I have listed some of them below. Feel free to add any.

TUMMY - Stomach.

PANTIES - Come on! Moms, never tell your son to put on his panties. Use the word underwear please.

PEE-PEE (POTTY) - This is mostly used in potty training. "Did you go pee-pee (potty)?" How about simply, "Did you go pee"?

POO-POO (POTTY) - Again with the potty training. "Did you go poo-poo (potty)?" Isn't it confusing to a child anyway to use the same phrase for both body functions? This is where us guys have to almost give in because there isn't really a good way to say this. I mean, it just wouldn't be right to say to a two year old, "Did you take a sh**?" Even "Did you take a crap" is inappropriate. So, most of us will use a variant of poo-poo and say poop. It still doesn't feel right to say it, but I don't think there are too many alternatives.

BOO-BOO - Not to be confused with poo-poo. There are plenty of other things you can say here instead like hurt, pain, scratch, laceration, gouge, severed limb, decapitation. It all depends on the situation. 

YUCKY - Disgusting, terrible, unpleasant, nasty, vulgar, gross.

ICKY - See above.  

KITTY CAT - It's just plain ole' cat. OK?

I know there are plenty of others, but I honestly can't think of any right now. I actually went to Google and tried to find some more, but either I didn't use the right search term or there just aren't a lot of people really concerned about this sort of thingy... I mean, uh... thing.

My kids were on Spring Break this past week. Last year, we went camping with some friends during Spring Break and it ended up raining every day we were there. We talked about doing that again, but other things came up. Good thing because early in the week we had a frost and the weather was too cold to be camping at the lake.

It had warmed up by Friday and the company that I work for actually gives us Good Friday off, so yesterday we took the kids to New Smyrna Beach. Our friends who went camping with us last year also went (minus the dad who had to work). It was fairly crowded yesterday, but it was a nice day. The sun was out with hardly a cloud in the sky. The only thing was the wind was worse than normal. That was OK too though because it kept us cool.

My son and I went into the the water for a while. The Atlantic Ocean is still cold this time of year, so it took some time to get used to it. We tried to body surf, but the waves weren't high enough. At one point I saw a fin in the water and panicked a little, but it turned out to be a dolphin. There were two of them and they swam along the coastline slowly, taking their time. I also saw a big stingray swim by me.

After we got out we played in the sand, building sandcastles and other sculptures that weren't quite discernible. Then, we walked up the beach and checked out the shells. Most of them were small or in pieces.

By five thirty the wind had really picked up, so we decided to leave. We had pulled our vehicle onto the beach while our friends had parked in a public parking area. When she got to her car she found out that someone had run into it and left. Fortunately, someone else had witnessed the hit and run and left a note on her car describing the other vehicle and giving their plate number. So, the police were called and a report filed.

We ended up stopping in Deland at a small Italian restaurant. I think it was called Fivola's, but I'm not 100% sure. The food was pretty good and when I went to pay I found a dollar bill that had a stamp on it stating "FIND OUT WHERE THIS BILL HAS BEEN AT WHERE'SGEORGE.COM." I jotted down the serial number and looked it up this morning before I started this post. Unfortunately, I spent the bill at the restaurant, so I couldn't make an entry on it. You have to have it in on you to do that.    

After the drive home we took a hot shower and hit the bed. I thought for sure I would sleep in this morning, but 7:30 rolled around and I was wide awake. Oh well, time to start another day.              

Three things have taken up my spare time lately.

First, I've been reading a lot. I've been stuck on Clive Cussler for a while now and even though sometimes the story is a little corny, I enjoy reading his books. Also, my brother has a collection of Louis L'Amour books and I've been raiding his library. I just finished Hondo and even though I am not much for reading westerns, I thought it was a great book.  

Second, my son and I planted the garden two weeks ago. We learned a lot from our gardening experience last year and we are hoping for even better results this year. We've got a drip water system set up and so far everything is looking pretty good. We're even getting prepared to try our hand at the pumpkins later on in the summer. That didn't work out for us last year, but I we know more about it now.

Finally, I don't exactly know the correct way to go about it, but I am in the process of writing a book. I know, I know... a lot of people say they want to write a book, but the truth is most of them don't. For me, it has become something of an obsession lately. It's not about writing so that it can be published, this is something that I am doing for myself. I just want to be able to say that I started it and completed it.

I take my writing seriously but, to be honest I am pretty private about it. Other than posting it here, I really haven't told a lot of people. I did tell one good friend at work. He was courteous and showed interest when I told him a little about the story, but I could tell that he was only trying to be nice. That's okay though. After all, I don't expect other people to be as excited about it as I am.  

Honestly, I'm not quite sure how I am doing the reading, writing and gardening and still have time for work and family. It's a balancing act, that's for sure, but isn't life always that way?

After the restaurant we were looking forward to our planned walk on the beach. My friend had told us that it wasn't far away and we found the road without any problems. The houses slowly started to thin out and after a while there was nothing but palmetto bushes and wet lands. It got to be pretty desolate and I was beginning to think we were on a road to nowhere when we finally saw a sign for a state park. As we came up to it both of us laughed. It wasn't a beach. It was a small sliver of land that had been cleared out on the edge of the Gulf.

We shook our heads and pulled into a small parking lot. The sign indicated there was a pier, so we got out and decided to take a walk. We couldn't see the pier because of the heavy tree cover so we walked up the wooden pathway that led to it. After a short walk we saw the pier extending out into the Gulf. The wind was blowing really hard that night and once we got past the trees it nearly blew us over. We headed out onto the pier with the wind to our backs. It was blowing so hard that there were white caps on the water and we  made it about 3/4 of the way when I said, "I don't really need to go all the way to the end. Do you?"

Donna answered with a quick no so we turned around and walked back. The wooden pathway veered off the the right toward the "beach" so we went that way. By now we were back under the trees and the wind was blocked. The pathway snaked through scrubby looking trees and hundreds of palmetto bushes. There were also small, brackish colored pools of water all around making it look more like a swamp than something you would see along a beach.

We finally came to a clearing and found the beach. There was plenty of sand, obviously shipped in, and we took off our shoes to get the whole effect and started walking on it. The wind was terrible, but there were still a few kids in water. Two boys in a canoe caught our attention. They were desperately trying to paddle against the wind and they weren't getting anywhere. They were, however, having a blast doing it.

There was a man with a metal detector. He had his headphones on and he was steadily swinging it back and forth. We passed a picnic table and a woman in shorts was sitting there, apparently watching her kids. She had on shorts and she had more tattoos than I think I have ever seen on a woman. I don't recall any of the pictures, but her legs were almost completely covered.

It took us all of about three minutes to walk most of the beach, but one portion of it was completely covered by seagulls, so we turned around to head back. As we headed back to the pathway the wind seemed to pick up and sand started pelting us from the rear. Donna let out a slight yell as the stinging grains slammed into the backs of her legs. We hurried off the beach to the cover of the pathway and slowly made it back to the car.

So, that was our romantic walk on the beach, but we made the best of it. Any time spent together is time well spent.         

One of the first sights worth mentioning wasn’t in the restaurant but on a billboard along the road to Crystal River. It advertised  in big letters the date of the upcoming “Cooter Festival”. Being from Florida, I know that a cooter is another word for a turtle. It was also the name of a colorful character on the old “Dukes of Hazzard” television show. And, in some circles, it is a slang word for a certain part of the female anatomy. My wife and I laughed at the fact that any of the three would, in fact, have some sort of festival named after them and we spent some time laughing at the possibility of any such event.
 
The first thing we noticed after being seated at the restaurant was the people who were at the table beside us. There were two couples, possibly in their fifties, and they were having a very good time. We know this because they were extremely loud. The women carried on a conversation at the same time as the men and all were trying to talk as loud as possible. Thankfully, they left shortly after we arrived and as they were leaving my wife noticed that both men had on t-shirts with off the wall comments. The man in the front had something advertising an "Albino Skunk Festival" while the second man had a cartoon picture of a woman skiing behind an airboat on the back of his shirt. Her bikini was in the process of flying off and she held a silly smile on her face (who knows, maybe she was headed to the Cooter Fest!). 
 
Not too long after they left another couple came in. I’m not sure why some men do this but he had his pants pulled up so far that they were literally around the center of his belly. Because he had them so high they had become high waters. I only mention this because if you are a man who happens to do this… STOP!!! It looks ridiculous.
 
There were a lot of older couples at the restaurant and one of the women on the patio caught my attention. If I didn’t’ know my mother was at home I could have sworn that it was her because this woman looked exactly like her. Her hair was the same color, she wore it in the same style and she even had the same kind of glasses. After I pointed her out to Donna neither one of us could take our eyes off of her.
 
There were a lot of young couples too and one such couple ventured out onto the patio and stopped right outside of our window to talk to some friends. She had on a short, white dress  and as they stood there with their backs to us the young man reached over, placed his left hand on her rear end and lingered there for quite some time, getting a good feel in the process. We weren’t the only ones with a ring side seat to this as there were plenty of tables placed next to the large window. It didn’t seem to bother the couple that they were on display and he eventually removed his hand and they moved along. I had no idea that dinner actually included a show. 
 
Those were the most colorful characters from our adventure at Crackers Restaurant in Crystal River, Florida. Even with the bad service provided by the staff of the restaurant it might be worth going back one day just to sit and people watch.
 
Next entry I will definitely get to our romantic (still a big laugh) walk on the beach.